what it feels like for a girl...

ok, no: not sex, silly....

The working environment. I like, respect, admire & enjoy working with my fellow female colleagues. I really do. 90%, no 99% of the time working around other women is a positively splendid experience. I'd almost prefer it to working with men, BUT...

It's just that other 1% of the time that bugs me. Not to complain about the off-da-chain gig, but the hormones are driving me crazy!!! They gossip about each other way too much for me-> I SO have better things to do. We (sistas that is) are always complaining about the way men treat us & we treat each other so badly it's ridiculous!!!!!

I mean do I have to get dogged out for having initiative & taking it? "She works too hard", " Why is she going out of her way to find stuff to do?" and "acting like _____ "?(insert whichever "bustin'-their-suckup-booty" person that's on the top of their hitlist this week in the blank field) Sheesh, it's like "the eyes of your employer are upon you" AND "the eyes of your co-workers are upon you too!". Damn. Did you ever get teased as a child for "talking too proper", "acting too smart" and "studying too much"? Don't we ever grow out of that? And if this were my only experience with that I wouldn't complain. BUT at the last gig where there was a large female presence, I experienced similar things.

I must admit, guys don't do this (as much or often) & most don't tolerate it. They're too busy trying to step on your neck to climb the corporate ladder to worry a lot about what you're doing. They just need to top whatever it is, if that's what it takes to get to the next rung, ya know?

OK, I vented. I feel a little better...

do YOU want to be a millionaire?

I was talking over lunch with a co-worker about retirement & budgets (me: feeling newly responsible broached the subject).
And something occurred to me as I shined the lightbulb over her head.
A) if you were living off $X.XX/year salary...
B) you suddenly began making 2 times $X.XX/year salary
C) you invest the difference, at say an average 6% a year interest...
D) You CAN retire a millionaire.
A valuable resource in this epiphany: bloomberg's retirement calculator
My point: I no longer need those caramel-colored suede pants, or that blazin hairstyle for the X-mas party. And I'm considering some home-made gifts (the thought that counts, blah...blah...blah).
The most important point: never allow your family, friends, kids, boyfriend, etc. to make your financial decisions for you OR tell you how to spend your money.

ok, gotta go...I need to go and "Just say NO" to some freeloaders....

today I WILL date!

my daughter's been bugging me.
"ma, why don't you go out?"
"ma, why don't you really date?"
I let her look over my shoulder at my BP dating page. We perused profiles, looked at pictures, read essays.
The conclusion: not only is the field of eligible men pretty limited, but once you apply your standards (intelligence, honesty, drug&drama-free, gainfully employed, etc..etc...), you may have about 5 good starters. I mean guys ready to step up to bat. And they KNOW they're ready, as well as knowing their value (compared to the minor leaguers you just weeded them out from). The problem: salary negotiation. What?! You thought these guys (the starters) were gonna settle for anything? Naw, shawty-> they want to be courted by agents, get offers thrown at them, freebies(booty, 5-star dinners, etc) before they even consider signing a contract. AND a fat-a$$ signing bonus. sheesh....

Anyway, a sista like me feels like my stock is definitely blue-chip: Class A stock. Not the end-of-the-night-in-the-club "ok, who'm I going home with tonight?" kinda stock. Not the "I-need-a-man-in-my-life" kinda stock. It would be nice, but it's not a necessity. I'm a long-term gainer, like a mutual fund. I may only show you a 2% return this quarter, but give me 10 years...I'm aggressive-growth over time, 20% return, ya know? The brothas are not interested in that at all....seems they all have exactly $1 and a dream.


so my daughter lost interest quick. She loves brothas, but she said (and I'm quoting) "ok, now I understand why you'd rather not be bothered. I thought high-school boys were bad. Even if they are attractive: they can't spell, are already taken & cheating, or are just freaks looking for a partner. You need a younger man, who's not jaded, still likes hip-hop, has a sense of humor and can still dress...." she kinda walked away in disgust midsentence. I keep hoping she'll call Ricki Lake, or Montel Williams & send me on a " My Mom Needs a Dating Makeover" show.

ok, gotta go....I SO pledged to myself that I was not going to blog constantly about my lack of a love life.

So, I have so MUCH to be thankful for:
two beautiful, intelligent, high-spirited and loving kids
a circle of eccentric, attractive, ambitious friends
that form my extended family, and are there for me
through thick and thin
(especially thin....
...because oooooweeeee
were there some thin moments
within this last year...whew)
a job that frankly, is BLAZIN`!
my health and happiness
a state of being spiritually centered and focused
being nappy-headed and loving it!
did I already mention that my job
no, I mean my new career is BLAZIN`?!
a family that may not be the closest-knit, but is supportive when necessary
(which is probably the most important thing anyway)
not being conceited about the abundance of positive qualities that I posess
but thankful that I definitely know...
and appreciate my self-worth
for mango-flavored sunrises and indigo sunsets
for the breath I just took, and the next

...hhmmmm, now if I had to state one thing that my life is lacking
oh yeah, y`all know what it may be...
social activity
playing as hard as I work
enjoying the fruits of my labor
A MAN!!!!!
feeling a little like Diana Ross in "Mahogany"
with a Billy Dee conscience
"success is nothing without someone to share it with"
ok, that is only SO true (according to my last bank statement, that is)
but it would be nice to have a sweetie
or two....
is it you? apply here